The Inner Thoughts & Insanity of my Life

I told you!

2008-03-16T22:05:00.003-04:00

So I told you I was obsessed with online scrapbooking...the big question is should this obsession turn into reality and not just virtual. I already have enough hobbies & sporting goods to fill at least one retail store - do I dare add another? I figure what is scrapbooking; some paper, a pair of scissors, a paper cutter, loads of stickers (or embelishments in the scrapbooking world) and a binder...Hmmm, then there's the paper and the stickers! You could fill an entire room with all the options - oh no wait, that room is already half filled with material from my sewing projects and a quarter full of the watercolor painting bonanza, and how much room do I have left maybe an eighth full of the acrillic and oil painting! Yes, that is right oh but then there's the pilates ball and the yoga mat -- so you see the internal struggle of do I *really* want more stuff when I don't use the stuff I have...But wait "this is the craft I've been looking for, I will *seriously* make time for this one. Oh the internal dialog!

Yes, I do think I have all this time; no my baby is not agreeing with me...Today's accomplishment: the baby napped and went to bed. Yep it took me all day to do that, so when do I get creative, oh when she naps - right?! Well by the time I get thru all the creative crap to find what I want the baby is awake. Yep hour to put her down for a free half hour. Now, I am a math teacher (or was) and let me tell ya, IT DOES NOT ADD UP!

Solution: Sleep training starting Thursday. Reality: my husband and I are desparately trying to talk ourselves into this...The *real* reality, I'll let you know if I'm still married Sunday! haha...

Sydney February & March 2008

2008-03-16T22:03:00.001-04:00

Make a scrapbook - it's easy!

New Obsessions

2008-02-07T10:36:00.001-05:00

Make a scrapbook - it's easy!

...and...oh yah

2007-04-23T21:12:00.000-04:00

95% chance "it" is a girl

Vacation All I Ever Wanted, Vacation Time to Get Away...

2007-04-23T20:57:00.000-04:00

Aruba, Jamacia oooohhh I want to take ya....

Okay I'll stop with random song quotes. So on a surprise last minute April Vacation mom & dad donated a week time-share and when we looked where we could go....not only did Maine pop up but so did ARUBA...let me think...ARUBA ARUBA. So in 1/2 hour we had a place to stay and some plane tix outta here to the island of no-more-snow!

Saturday woosh we're there, by about 1pm. Not much to report, just the usual lost luggage (I mean "delayed" luggage). We put our bathing suits in the carry on so we didn't care. By the time we grabbed lunch and made the resort change our room; our bags were delivered. The first room was right on the pool and main hallway so it was just too loud "for the baby" haha.

A whole week sitting under a pool or beach umbrella, slathered in sunblock, doing water aerobics, sleeping, eating & reading (2 whole books thank you very much)! AGGGHHHH. What more could one want? Oh TO STAY FOREVER! It was a well needed break. Little delayed getting home and the same story with the delayed luggage. Back in Boston, it took them until 9:30pm the next day to get it to me though...but hey, who needs a bathing suit in Boston in April - OHHHH unless maybe TODAY WHEN IT WAS 90 DEGREES!...

Back to life, Back to Reality....(that's it for the songs I swear :) )Landlords "stop by" 2 hours later, I literally kick them out of the house with "the pregnancy if I don't eat I'll throw up or freak out if you don't leave" bit...Okay so the update...We have til June 30th to decide if we're

1. moving out (notice by June 30th, out by Aug 31)
2. moving downstairs & sign another year lease
3. make and offer

The downstairs is deleaded for the child and by law they have to provide a deleaded place for us to live...Upstairs where we are is not, and because we won't stay for 10 million years they'd rather have us move. They did offer to help move our stuff though, and mention the slight possibility that they might want to move in up here...arg...Can you trace a blog to a person? Because I have more to say but am completely paranoid now that "they'll" find this.

Please send me back to the island, I'll be the towel girl/drink girl/water aerobic girl....ANYTHING....No more reality!

Wooosh Wooosh Woosh

2007-03-23T19:16:00.000-04:00

Finally, we heard the heart beat! Estimated 150 beats per minute....two ultra sounds down, numerous pee in a cup tests and more blood.

The other day a student came to tell me she tested positive on her TB test, so now the doctor has one more test to perform.

I still am unhappy with my doctor, but can't get the friend recommended doc to call me back...eek, Hello, I only have 5 more months!

My belly started popping out, I get an update from my students hourly on how much they think I am now showing. Found maternity pants for $8 at Khols (woohoo) so what if they are courdory's because it's still freaking snowing in MA!

A huge craving for bread pudding was completely satisfied today, warm banana bread pudding with icecream & whipped cream. Now ladies, that *is* a lunch!

The News is on it!

2007-03-01T16:58:00.000-05:00

No worries, the news vans showed up today to cover the story...

High School Chemistry gone wrong - Epson salt was the culprit. Pranksters thought it would be funny to see what happened when Epson salts were put into the drinking water "Poland Spring" type bubbler.

We got a cell phone blast message that said the substance was not harmful...so I guess we'll watch the news today to find out more details.

Thank goodness I bring my own tap water filled Nalgene bottle - but now I'm extra careful and strap it to my belt at all times!

White Powdery Substances

2007-02-28T15:10:00.000-05:00

About 1:30 the school goes on lockdown, and the teachers have to lock their doors and no students are allowed to leave the classrooms.

Then at 1:40 all after school activiites are cancelled and students must exit the building immediately. The administrative staff does a full sweep to evacuate all students.

Turns out, on the second floor there was some white substance found. A teacher & student drank from the water bubbler near the white stuff and started to have a reaction and their mouths were burning. They were sent to the hospital. Haz mat was called.

I figured if it wasn't safe for students to remain in the building i was outta there!

Then as i was walking out the vice principal was saying that if hazmat determines it is a toxic substance we might have to be out of the building for 72 HOURS!

woooohoooooyyahhhhhhhh.....this is better than snow! So now i have to watch tv all after noon for breaking news!

A Year in Review

2007-02-23T13:36:00.000-05:00

So, I didn't think it was so bad that the last post was September 30....until it was so kindly pointed out by ficemook that it was September 30, 2005. Apparently I missed out on a whole year of my blogging.

Here it goes - a whole year - in one post. Are you ready for this? No I said ARE YOU READY...

September 2005 - June 2006 I get up at 5:30 everyday and go work at an urban high school teaching math...blah blah. I might have had some fun vacations: oh February I went to Colorado and kick butt skiing. It felt great, and surprised my boyfriend at my lightening speed. Fine, maybe not lightening, but I was able to get down the mountain without any major wipeouts. April headed to Texas to visit ma & pa. Back to June 2006 - schools almost out...

June 2006 - in a surprise move the boyfriend asks "Will you marry me?" I think he's kidding and tell him not to mess with my head, then he whips out "the" box "Will you marry me?" YES YES YES YES....June 24, 2006 I am a bridesmaid in my brothers wedding. It feels so much nicer to be standing up there, knowing that I too get to be a bride!!!

July - August 2006 Planning centeral

September 2, 2006 Mike and I are married in El Paso Texas with 12 of our family and friends with us in an amazing intimate ceremony. (agh yah that's right 2 months after the engagement hehe)

September 5, 2006 School starts. yuck...There are not enough teachers for the Freshman class, so the "school" thinks its a good idea to stick me with an Algebra class that is 120 minutes long to kill a period for the Freshman. Gee, thanks...Then there's no other sophomore teacher so my Geometry class has 35 (legal limit 31) hmmm...back to "yuck" and that's about all for school.

October 21, 2006 We have a big party (aka belated reception) and eat lots of lobster and celebrate with all of our friends and family at a local clamshack.

December 24, 2006 HONEYMOON TIME! Yes, most people are making fun of us at this point because we've manage to stretch wedding festivities from September - December...hehe. So we hop on a plane to Costa Rica for an amazing relaxing yet active honeymoon.

January 2007 I'm in the right year! We toasted the year off in Costa Rica at a pool side New Years Eve party, complete with buffet and dancing. And home we flew January 1, 2007.

February 2007 - our latest amazing honeymoon picture! A little bean at 11 weeks old...with a heart beat of 171 beats per minute.

....

And now your up to date....I asked if you were ready??!

Coming Apart at the Seams

2005-09-30T18:04:00.000-04:00

Okay, I planned on using this as a weekly reflection, but haven't been faithful...Just add that to the eat right, exercise, drink more water, drink less "drinks", pick up my clothes list I guess.

I read that you should only make a list with one item so you feel successful....what's the sense?
1. Make List CHECK....yeahooo I'm a success today! haha.

I looked forward to year 2 of teaching because it was "so much easier". I have offically cried more since school started Sept 8 than I did all last year. In my critical thinking on the ride home I came up with the answer - last year when it all went haywire I could just say "Oh, this is my first year teaching...I really didn't know that. I should make note of that so I know next year" haha...."oops first year, silly me".

Now I am putting all this pressure on myself..."Should have known...second year" haha...well I don't freaking know. I have more students than ever. I am forever under piles of uncorrected "crap". Friday, friday - I'm at school til 5pm! Some laugh and say oh teachers, I am at work at 7pm sometimes....Well, to those that laugh, I'm calling at 6am when I leave my house IN THE DARK....side note: The sunset was AMAZING today. Brilliant red & orange lighting up the city as I drove thru. Looked like the city was on fire!

I have a math "coach" who is monitoring me 2 days a week. Has critized every part of everything. The big mistake I made: (others learn here) she told me to relate math words to regular vocab words. I'm extremely insecure about my vocab and honestly hate it so I told her I didn't feel comfortable relating math to regular words b/c I don't know if I know them....She has now gotten on the vocab war path and has insulted everything that comes out of my mouth! Gone as far as to tell me to "read the Geometry book, because the words and definitions are highlighted" arg.

So I cry. The principal calls me into her office, and I cry more...And here's the best part of the week...Nasty-ass teacher (yes co-worker) calls me over - she's on bathroom duty, I'm on hall duty - and says, you were in the pricipals office during your duty. Did you get called in? Was the principal aware that you were on a duty? Did you sit in there during your duty?...So I said if you paid that close attention then you would have noticed I was bawling my eyes out and the office was a better place for me to be than the halls. Oh, yes I am the only one assigned to hall duty that does it, daily! Okay...enough rambles....I guess this doesn't count as reflection on my teaching...can I CHECK it off anyway?

One Week In....

2005-09-14T17:16:00.000-04:00

School started Tuesday for the teachers and Thursday for the students...I hate the first couple days of icebreakers and settling in. I hate going to meetings and being asked to hold hands with strangers and trade stories. I can imagin an image conscious teenager hates it more, not that I asked any of my classes to hold hands.

I have "true" freshmen for the first time. My freshman class last year was stocked with "repeaters" who were 17+...So now I have 14 year olds brand spankin new to the school, and they are little peanuts. Too scared to do much but give me blank stares like I'm on crack (which they probably would know if I were I guess) I do have three super social girls who are adorable, they try to talk to everyone and say good morning.

I am teaching two Geometry courses. One is an energetic bunch, the other...sheesh I'm bored just being near them! They are completely devoid of personality or the ability to crack the smallest smile. And....whine whine whine....eek!

Then there's the "repeaters", this years repeaters are from my courses last year. So yes, I failed them, now they get me with the same subject *again* - Now that is setting everyone up for success. The thing is, most of the students in this course are FUNNY so at least we're all entertained.

My throat kills, my legs are sore and my mind is exhausted. My brain is so tired it is making my face hurt. I've been working the 6:30 am to 4:30 pm shift...and getting up at 5:00 am agh, stinks! Who decided to start school at the crack of dawn was an evil evil person.

How Things Change

2005-09-02T17:59:00.000-04:00

...so off to EL today to finish moving grandma's stuff out of her house so that her house can be sold. I can't imagine the stress of moving out of a home after living in it for 20 years. Probably because the longest I've been in one place is 5 years...My mom and two of her sisters are preparing the stuff that cannot fit into the assisted living apartment for a tag sale. Great-grandmas punch bowl for a dollar.

As if that is not enough emotional stress, I get a phone call on the way out. One of my students has been arrested and charged with assult and battery with a dangerous weapon. He happened to be one of the students that I bonded with. The man he beat up, has now died, there might be a manslaughter charge added. He's 17. He will be charged as an adult. Monday I checked my class list, and called my fellow teacher to tell her that he was in my class again and I couldn't wait to see him. Out of all 120 students listed on my roster, he's the only name I said.

I really thought I would have a second chance with him.

He would steal my coffee in the morning try to hide it, he would pester me the days he came in exactly at 8 am to go to the bathroom. We'd get on each others nerves. My favorite was as I pushed my "shopping" cart full of books and files down the hall he'd jump on it. My feet would slide along the floor and I'd distort my face to make it look as if I were straining. The other teachers would yell at him to get off, we'd laugh and eventually he'd come to my side and push the cart to the other side of the building.

Posession, distribution, intent to sell - sure he probably did that, and I would not be surprised if he got a few months probation for that, but never in a million years would I think he'd get picked up for what could end up being murder.

What now? What's my role...People are horrified that I want to do something...but it breaks my heart to think this funny kid will rot in jail.

Ficemook this one is for you....

2005-08-31T22:28:00.000-04:00

I have created yet another username and password combination that will probably get lost in "the pile to file" aka don't have any idea what to do with...

After househunting and apartment searching for two plus months, I was able to see lots of other peoples living spaces, and I never fail to wonder - Where is their "pile to file"??! Especially these inner city artsy lofts where all the minimalists live. Don't minimalists still have bills??? They must have cable with their flat screen, plasma tv's. oh Come on!

So, I have six days til I begin my second year of teaching at Southie. Every "Back to School" sign causes cramps in my stomach and makes me want to vomit! I should be confident, this is my second year, but I am scared.

I've already overplanned by two days. I've done more planning this week than I think some teachers do all year. When do I get to that point? I have icebreakers to last a lifetime! And because I hate doing them, I will probably just chicken out and make the students do math...against all experts advice.

Does spelling count on this?

I start the year with my only "work" friend, fired; giving professional development to teachers with at minimum 8 years of seniority (new kid on the block giving teaching tips! haha!) and having pushed a senior member of the staff out of his room so he now gets the shopping cart and I get to live in one room with math posters everywhere! ...I'm scared.

...oh Bring it On, How bad can it be????
...tune in to find out....

The Inner Thoughts & Insanity of *my* Life